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Weekly Caption


Previous Winning Captions

DatePictureAuthorCaption
TodayCoxy"Skegness unveils its latest tourist attraction: The Eyeful Tower."
27/06/09Coxy"The new Unhappy Meal. Ba ba ba ba baaa...I'm blubbin' it."
21/06/09Morris Persil"Suggs found dead in office"
13/06/09Dunelmus"Phwooooar. They let a woman in this race, Gerald!"
06/06/09Tosser spotter"The missing Searchy files are under the car dear."
30/05/09Dunelmus"Britain's got talent audition goes as usual..."
23/05/09Ricardo"When I said I wanted a white one and two browns this wasn't what I had in mind"
16/05/09stu13"New Chrysler sports range....no wonder they went bust!"
09/05/09Morris Persil"The new men's Autumn range is out now at Debenhams"
02/05/09Roger Red Hat"I've got some good news and some bad news. The good news is I've washed the cars...."
25/04/09Coxy"I'm just axe-sking for a lift."
18/04/09stu13"Ressurection.....My Arse!"
11/04/09A lost conspiracy"Little girl shows Obama what its like to be cocked and bombed"
04/04/09stu13"When you said I'd get to shoot a load on our honeymoon....this isn't what I had in mind!"
28/03/09Dunelmus"What are you fucking looking at, Mr Fritzl?"
21/03/09Filth"Give her away, no fuck it, I'm gonna do a Josef Fritzl."
14/03/09stu13"That proves it....sea lions will go to any length for a fishy meal!"
07/03/09Coxy"Bamboo shoots, buy one get one free at the Shell garage."
28/02/09Coxy"We made it across The Sahara, through Afghanistan, then we get to Liverpool and this happens."
21/02/09A lost conspiracy"Raj Kumar's long lost wife steals phone from clumsy Briton and disguises it as a baby"
14/02/09A lost conspiracy"Snow blowing gets taken to whole new extremes this winter"
07/02/09Coxy"My fucking car is always getting keyed! I'm driving this now, to make sure they don' key it no more.."
31/01/09Tosser spotter"I can't wait to meet those 72 virgin hens"
25/01/09Dunelmus"Caption of the Week rapidly went downhill after they let the work experience boy take charge."
24/01/09Ricardo"Beefeater? I've been eating beans."
17/01/09Coxy"The new sport 'Oatzing' taks the country by storm."
10/01/09Honest George"Honest George finds desperatly needed parking space."
03/01/09stu13"Hamas' response to Israeli airstrike falls flat.... "
27/12/08Morris Persil"If I stand on me head, it might just distract the punters from this ponce dressed as a fucking Battenburg cake."
20/12/08A lost conspiracy"Damn these poles, coming into our country and stealing our women"
13/12/08Tosser spotter"Can you put on that sexy little red mudguard I bought for you"
06/12/08Morris Persil" Kids these days can't tell their ass from a hole in the ground"
29/11/08John Leslie"India's edition of Pimp My Ride suffers from lack of budget"
22/11/08John Leslie"Those who foretold it are dead. Those who can stop it are in grave danger."
15/11/08derby4ever""Your - right, your Weapon is Big,Black and Heavy. But why must i Lick-It ? ""
08/11/08Dunelmus"But it is genuine Tupperware!"
01/11/08stu13"Madonna's shopping spree after Guy split-up.....!"
25/10/08Tosser spotter"If you want this stick you'll have to stop biting my arse"
18/10/08Jack Johnson"From the makers of 'Snakes on a Plane' comes 'Hippos on a pole'"
11/10/08Dunelmus"The new Volkswagen Mule, does 500 miles to the gallon."
04/10/08Sanitys Last Hope"Now coming to a store near you, princess diana barbies"
26/09/08A lost conspiracy"The grubbs are out for a nice sunday ride on their ZionMobile"
20/09/08A lost conspiracy"Hey how did the hadron collider get into my toilet?"
14/09/08Man in the Pub"Now stick a ticket on the fucking windscreen."
06/09/08A lost conspiracy"Boris approves the chinese cloning programme"
30/08/08A lost conspiracy"I want my baby back, baby back, baby back, ribs"
23/08/08Ricardo""Looooook Kev, isn't that a warcraft card on the floor??""
16/08/08Webby"The specially designed 'bowl' contains the majority of the nuclear blast. The rest is absorbed by the fucking athletes dominating BBC."
09/08/08Ricardo"Man tries to break Ulrika Jonsson's world prick taking record."
02/08/08Ricardo"China's new 'pay as you blow' taxi service."
26/07/08Dunelmus"You think this is bad, you wanna see the bird that blew Clinton!"
19/07/08Dunelmus"Oh, roger me Theodore, before its time for my 2pm nap!!!"
12/07/08Ricardo"Get off me you fat cunt."
05/07/08A lost conspiracy"Raj Kumar trains in C.I.A evasion techniques"
28/06/08Tosser spotter"Test trials of new Whiskas Acid flavour are abandoned"
21/06/08stu13"And they say AIDS travels fast....."
14/06/08stu13"michael jackson goes to new lengths to attract children!"
07/06/08Tosser spotter"How to kill grey squirrels, this fucking Google thing is great."
31/05/08stu13"Animals revolt at state of global economy!"
24/05/08stu13"Boris Johnson reveals new London public service scheme"
17/05/08vitriol"I feel like a right tit!"
10/05/08A lost conspiracy"Which one of these leads to narnia then?"
03/05/08vitriol"Viagra, a concrete guarantee in any difficult situation."
26/04/08A lost conspiracy"Fantastic photoes as voyager 2 swings by Uranus"
19/04/08vitriol"Kerry Katona's latest birth pictures leaked early onto the Internet?"
12/04/08vitriol".. so I kicked her in the face". "Enough about me, do you want 'something for the weekend' Mr Treguard?""
05/04/08A lost conspiracy"this weeks fruit smoothie-one israeli soldier"
29/03/08Dunelmus"'F*ck me,' said Knut, 'That bastard Treguard was right!'"
22/03/08Dunelmus"He-man and battlecat have really let themselves go..."
15/03/08Webby"Please to not be switching on the power, Mr Hagen sir!"
08/03/08vitriol"Camilla didn't need much of a disguise when visiting her nephew in Helmand province."
01/03/08Ricardo""What could possibly go wrong?" Said The Venom, just before his world record attempt."
23/02/08Jack Johnson"Told you this metal detector worked."
16/02/08Tosser spotter"Does my bomb look big in this?"
09/02/08stu13""David Cameron assures Gordon Brown water and electrics are a safe combination!""
02/02/08Webby"The new spokewoman for Sheila's Wheels."
26/01/08Webby"Copilot to Pilot: "If this is runway 27R, then why is there a Little Chef 500 yards ahead?""
19/01/08soozeequeue"'You've got a huge crack in your gasket madam'"
12/01/08Webby"Massive recall of artificial hips after stupid old bitch kicks herself in the head."
05/01/08soozeequeue"I would rather end it all now than continue sitting on my only oversized testicle"
29/12/07Webby"Look, kids - Santas dead - now f*ck off and buy your own Xbox!"
22/12/07Webby"Those interested in water-sports should turn to page 5, to see Sharon doing a Wii."
15/12/07Webby"New dog food, with 20% superglue, deemed a success at keeping cyclists off the grass in London parks."
08/12/07Dunelmus"Bin Laden has get away car at the ready..."
01/12/07Webby"Top Gun 2 looks like it should come in well under budget..."
24/11/07vitriol"Rik Wallers maid starts her month long epic of hoovering the bottom of his cage."
17/11/07Webby"I'm sorry, I appear to have dishonorably discharged myself, young lady."
10/11/07Ricardo"Ulrika tries the original Quarter Pounder with Cheese."
03/11/07vitriol"C'mon Aunt Sally! Strap it on an' give ole Wurzel a good seein' too!"
27/10/07Webby"Rolf Harris was telling me about his friend Jake, he might be able to sort you out, Heather."
20/10/07Lord Reaper"Is that my testicles in your bra, or am i just happy to see you."
13/10/07Ricardo""Oi Britney, how about getting the kids out BEFORE you do your hair?""
06/10/07Ricardo"Guy Ritchie arrives home with the wifes new double ended dildo."
29/09/07Webby"Pilot to co-pilot: "When Amy Winehouse came into the cabin, I thought you said 'ditch'"."
22/09/07vitriol"The queue at the Northern Rock where kept fully entertained by the local tramps playing "pass the vomit""
15/09/07vitriol"No Princess Leia, I am CAS519, C3PO is over there parking an imperial destroyer!"
08/09/07Tosser spotter"I don't know why, but my fingers keep going for the G String."
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